Solitude

I can't remember when I last vocalised anything today (apart from singing along to "That's What Makes You Beautiful" but that kind of ruins my point). This morning I went to the gym, did my thang and came back to an empty house where I have been pottering around, finishing my book, eating spoonfuls of nutella, then changing to peanut butter, watching youtube videos, then changing back to nutella, ironing (note to mum- very subtle leaving the ironing board out for me to trip over). I will never understand when people don't like their own company, sure you get the occasional odd look when you're in coffee shops by yourself, reading the paper in the middle of the day, but to me there's something calming about spending the day with nothing more than the slurp of tea, the tip tap of keyboard keys, the sound of a page turning and your own insanity.

Rain, kindly bugger off

dreich- a combination of dull, overcast, drizzly, cold, misty and miserable weather.

Here in Britain we are somewhat fixated by the weather. The clichés are endless and you know that a conversation isn’t going anywhere when it turns to the climate, and yet this post is going to be just about that- weather. I’m usually all for the weather in Britain, we get ridiculously excited when the sun shines and everybody flocks to the nearest beer garden, pubs sell out of cider and there are entirely too many pasty beer bellies on show. Despite this I am here to say: Mother Nature will you please get a grip, it’s July and I am having to stuff my soggy shoes with newspaper. 

despite appearances I do not live on the banks of a river

Tonight I had to cancel plans because I couldn’t find a way to navigate the flooded roads, what is this madness? In July I would like to be peeling myself off of leather seats outside and consuming my bodyweight in ice cream please. The rain is currently at the point where if you stood outside for five seconds you would get wetter than if you jumped in a swimming pool fully clothed, and that’s pretty wet. Now, does anyone going to a sunnier clime happen to have space in their suitcase? 

Starting anew

I used to have a blog but then I started to whinge on it, so this new one is going to be a happy place filled with bunnies and rainbows etc [disclaimer: I may well whinge on this blog too, but perpetually happy people are irritating anyway and should stub their toe. The baby one].

Since then I have acquired a third hole in my nose and have (temporarily) dyed my hair red, but I'm still the same tea loving-math studying-foul mouthed twitter fanatic I've always been, just with an extra orifice.

Been enjoying the summer sunshine [hah, I can't even get that out without laughing- I live in Scotland, there's as much chance of having a sunny summer as there is the Queen being absolutely shnozzled at her next public event]. I hit up Rockness a couple of weeks ago which was amazing, the only bad thing about the whole weekend was having to decant a bottle of vodka into a plastic Robinsons bottle before I went, definitely the least classy thing I've ever had to do. Ever. However in a bid to restore the natural order of things I also baked a banana loaf to take with me. Well, that was either restoring things to their natural order or else it was me practising to be a future 'desperate housewife'- watch this space. Acts were all amazing and I discovered a new fave- Kassidy. Queue much cyber stalking. Mumford were, of course, fantastic even if I did nearly get absolutely mauled by people body barging their way to the front. I'm not one for going up on shoulders though, mostly because I find it crazy annoying when people right in front of you push their behinds in your face. There was a keen bean Liverpudlian who kept trying to get me to do it, but I politely declined.

Planning our movements for the Saturday

Since returning from Rockness I have been in a very 'seize the day' type of mood. In the wise words of Mr Jack Black "I'm fairly certain YOLO is just Carpe Diem for stupid people". I hereby promise to never stick those four letters together on my blog again. That can be our code word- if 'YOLO' is written on my blog it means I'm in mortal danger. Recently however seizing the day has proved to be difficult as a sizeable chunk of my friends have all gone away on holiday at the same time. What do Spain/Egypt/USA have that I don't?

In the spirit go living each day like it's my last (personally I think LEDLIYL is much catchier than 'YOLO', but who am I?) last night I went to a comedy show with a friend. The comedy was good but I was unlucky enough to be one of the people singled out by a comedian. I can't even really remember what he said, it was a traumatic blur. I will never again judge people on tv who get singled out in an audience and look like they want to be anywhere else in the world, I was on the edge of my seat for the rest of the night, terrified it would happen again.

Like a fairly large percentage of (middle class) Britain I'm currently watching Wimbledon, the quote of the tournament so far came from my Grandma who said that you can 'hear that bloody Sharapova even when the tv is on mute'. Grandparents are the best, even if this particular one has taken it upon herself to refer to me as a 'red haired hussy'.